Bet You Can't Eat Just One


There are hundreds of places around the world that are unique and of interest to many of us. There are however, number of places that are relatively obscure and happened upon by pure chance. One such place is in, where else, but Chandler, Arizona (like anyone has been to Chandler), and it is affectionately known as the Heart Attack Grill.


If the name doesn’t give it away, the minute you walk through the door you’ll know exactly where you are. The owner, who goes by the name of Dr. John, has a simple motto: ‘Food worth dying for,’ and it certainly is. Dr. John walks around in a lab coat with a stethoscope around his neck, but he has not been recognized by the American Medical Association as a valid physician.


The nurses, who double as waitresses, are not real nurses either, although they are dressed in ‘Hooter’ style nurses uniforms. Unlike much advertising nowadays there’s absolutely nothing misleading about the posters and representation of the Heart Attack Grill. The staff readily admits that if you eat enough of their food, it will kill you.


So, what type of food can you get in this establishment? Fundamentally, it is a burger joint serving single, double, triple and quadruple bypass burgers. The most famous is of course, the quadruple bypass burger. It is made up of four, half pound patties, practically an entire tomato and half an onion. The buns are coated in lard, and then the entire sandwich is melted together with eight thick slices of cheese.


Surprisingly, there is no salad bar, instead there is an all you can eat French fries bar, where all the fries are deep fried in lard. Dr. John proudly explains “There are no Diet Coke’s, there is no light beer, and we don’t even put lettuce on our burgers.”


Business is booming and you have to wonder why? The customers are referred to as patients, and the general consensus is, people are tired of constantly reading how bad everything out there is for them. Consequently, for one single moment, they can devour a sugar saturated, large Coca-Cola, a quad burger, dripping with fat and a heaping order of French fries, which are sure to clog your arteries.


Of course, my curiosity sprang forward and I wondered just how many calories one of these quad burgers contained. Well, it seems when you have devoured a fully loaded (and there is no other way to order it), quad, you will have consumed 8,000 calories (not counting fries or beverage). In case you didn’t know, the average adult should take in around 2,000 calories per day.


Next time you’re in the Phoenix, Arizona area, stop by the Heart Attack Grill, but I warn you, limit your quadruple bypass burger to one a day.

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